Taking Responsibility for “Your Story”.
People ask what it means to Coach people in Responsibility. Everything we have in our lives as adults we chose. Friends, Family, Romance, jobs to food are all choices we make. My grandmother loved milk and cookies and would send me to the store for Grandma’s Cookies. They were these two large gourmet chocolate chip cookies, at least 40 years ago they were. She would get them and explain how dipping them in milk made them “oh so good!” So of course, I grew up loving to eat cookies and milk. So much so I got a gallon of milk and a bag of Mother’s Chocolate Chip cookies for Christmas. As I got older and heavier, I struggled with losing wait and breaking my love of cookies and milk seemed impossible.
When ever I’d become sad, down or even just had a long day I would always reward myself with 2 packs of cookies and some milk. It was a daily thing all while I’m trying to work out. I may leave them alone for a bit then I’d have a reason to celebrate or a reason to feel bad and cookies always made everything better. As an adult I lived away from my grandmothers and hadn’t realized how I took their comforting ways with me. To give up cookies and milk was like giving up my grandmother or at bare minimum making her wrong. I had developed an absolute that cookies were good and removed my responsibility of choosing sugar over weight loss.
Now it’s easy pointing this out now but at the time I was completely oblivious to this limiting belief around cookies. It was an absolute and I couldn’t get around it. I tried all kinds of diets and my weight would just come back, until. Until I could understand the story around my love for my grandmother. Taking responsibility made me look at my choice repeatedly until the full picture could be revealed. Letting go of cookies and milk would not make my grandmother wrong and it wouldn’t mean I could experience her love. Taking responsibility for my story made clear for me how I needed to have more family in my life more and removed my grandmothers love from sugar. At the time I was 230 lbs. with dieting and working out, today I’m 180 lbs. and sometimes 190 lbs. because I still love sugar.
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